Do you think God thirsts for you more, or do you thirst for Him more? Does God love you more, or do you love Him more?

For most people, this is a very difficult question to answer. The answer itself is obvious because cognitively speaking, we know that God’s thirst for us must be greater than ours for Him, and His love for us must be more intense and complete than our love for Him. However, our experiences and feelings tell us otherwise…

If God really loves and thirsts for me so deeply, why is my life still filled with so much suffering and challenges? Why do the situations in life always seem to go against my will? Why doesn’t God care to answer my prayers, the things that I have been begging Him for day after day? Why does He watch me suffer without even extending a helping hand?

Oh my soul, please know that God is not indifferent, heartless or refusing to help when He sees us in pain and being hung out to dry. In fact, it is heart-wrenching for Him to see us suffering and feeling aggrieved. Like any earthly parents, Our Heavenly Father feels the pain when He sees a child fall and get hurt when growing up, or make the wrong move and thus experience setbacks or lose direction in life, or even being devastated by traumatic experiences. All parents should know that this is part of their children’s growth, and they know they should not intervene in every aspect of their children’s lives and deprive them of the opportunities to make decisions and grow.

That is how our Heavenly Father feels for us but only a million times stronger than how earthly parents would feel for their children! Moreover, since God has given us the freedom to choose, He will respect our decisions and the consequences that come with them. Otherwise, if God intervenes, it would mean that He is taking away our freedom to choose and the opportunities to grow that come with it.

Doesn’t it make sense? If we do not need to bear any consequences for the wrong decisions that we make in life and if God always intervenes and  fixes them for us, we would keep making the same mistakes. We would hurt ourselves and others and never learn and grow from them. You must have met some immature adults who burden and wound others by their irresponsible decisions.

In fact, our Heavenly Father is in a very difficult position: each of His children has different demands and His children’s decisions do have an impact on other brothers and sisters. How can God answer everyone’s requests and prayers? Particularly, when our wishes deviate from God’s will or are in conflict with each other’s, how can God only answer the prayer of one child but ignore those of the others? Wouldn’t He be accused of favouritism or being unfair? What is our Heavenly Father supposed to do? We ask God to be considerate of our needs and circumstances, but do we ever consider the difficulties that our Heavenly Father faces and which He cannot reveal to us?

Moreover, the difficulties and pains in life have a certain value. Isn’t that so? As the example previously cited: before enjoying a lavish dinner, we may even skip lunch to preserve our appetite to enjoy the meal.

Achievements in life that are easily attainable are not considered precious, so we tend not to cherish them.

So, is it really a good thing for us to keep asking our Heavenly Father to take away all our pains and difficulties, or ask Him to give us everything we need? Is that what a responsible father should do? In the end, will it benefit us or harm us? Is it really best for us that our Heavenly Father follows our will? My soul, can you be fair to our Heavenly Father? Will you understand His unspeakable dilemmas?

Can you accept that even though He loves us deeply, He still allows us to experience some pain in life for our own good?

Reflection

Now, in silence, please reflect on how you relate to our Heavenly Father and whether your requests of Him are reasonable.

Have you ever experienced an overwhelming sense of fulfillment after overcoming some difficulties or challenges in life? Would you be willing to live a life without any of these painful experiences and difficulties?

Please take a moment to quiet down and let the loving and compassionate gaze of our Heavenly Father rest upon you, allowing yourself to experience and savour His real and unreserved love.

Today’s Prayer

Merciful Father, I am sorry. I have always focussed on my own needs, often feeling that I have been wronged and am suffering, and complaining that You haven’t heard my prayers. It turns out that You are the one who is most misunderstood and You suffer much as a result. I haven’t really attended to or cared enough about You. I ignored Your needs, and questioned Your love for me. Why do You often remain silent and not share Your pain with me? Father, I’m sorry! Let me learn to love You again!

Heavenly Father, I love You!

Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit, as it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, world without end. Amen.

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